Sunday

Heaven or Hell


One day while walking down the street a highly successful executive woman was hit by a bus and died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.

"Welcome to Heaven," said St.Peter. "Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem. Oddly enough, we've never once had a Fortune 500 executive make it to Heaven and we're not really sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in." said the woman.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have higher orders. What we're going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend eternity in."

"Actually, I think I've made up my mind...I prefer to stay in Heaven", said the woman.

"Sorry, we have rules..." And with that St. Peter put the executive in an elevator down to Hell. The doors opened and she found herself stepping out onto the putting green of a beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club and standing in front of her were all her friends -- fellow executives that she had worked with and they were all dressed in evening gowns and cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her and talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf and at night went to the club where she enjoyed an excellent steak and lobster dinner. She met the Devil who was actually a really nice guy and she had a great time dancing. She was having such a good time that before she knew it, it was time to leave. Everybody shook her hand and waved good-bye as she got on the elevator.

The elevator went up and opened back up at the Pearly Gates where St. Peter was waiting for her. "Now it's time to spend a day in Heaven," he said. So she stepped through the gates and spent the next 24 hours lounging around on clouds, playing the harp, eating vegan food, and listening to contemporary jazz. She had a so-so time but was feeling a little bored when St. Peter came and got her.

"So, you've spent a day in Hell and you've spent a day in Heaven. Now you must choose your eternity," he said.

The woman replied, "Well, Heaven has been really great and all, but I think I had a better time in Hell."

So St. Peter escorted her to the elevator, wished her well, and again she went down back to Hell. When the doors of the elevator opened this time, she found herself standing in a desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in sacks with holes. The Devil came up to her and extended a burlap sack to her with a wicked smile. "I don't understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and we danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland of garbage and all my friends are miserable."

The Devil looked at her while still smiling and said, "Yesterday we were recruiting you, today you're staff."

Moral of the Story: Companies do a lot to recruit you, but not all that is promised is delivered.

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